“Life is hard, and then you die,” was my grandfather’s favorite saying. I learned many lessons from my grandfather. Growing up during the depression, his life was hard. He helped his widowed mother support the family of eight. He worked to construct the Alaska Highway during WWII since his German background prevented him going overseas. And he worked long hours at his machinist’s shop supporting his own growing family.
Yet, what I remember about him are the success stories -- how he and my grandmother welcomed everyone, young and old, rich and poor, of any race. How he was able to give my parents a car for a wedding present. That car was actually two wrecked vehicles he’d been left with and put together, but it worked for years.
My grandfather taught me the tools I needed to survive, the most important was the courage to face adventure and challenge. I’d run into his living room and tell him about how I liked this boy at school and he didn’t notice me. So Grandpa would say, “What are you going to do about it? Always take action to make the changes you want and need.”
“Always take action.” This leads to determination and perseverance. Always see clearly what you want, and strive for it. Then there’s patience which is necessary if you intend to stay sane while working towards your goal! I’ve learned that what you strive for is what you will achieve. So be careful what you work towards. I didn’t like to fail. (That boy did end up noticing me, but by that point, I’d realized that he didn’t have other qualities that I learned to recognize while working towards getting his attention.) Grandpa knew. He knew that if I worked for something, I’d realize whether the prize was worth it.
This was another lesson I learned – “Make sure the goal is worthy.” What makes a goal worthwhile?
The balance lies with charity, that is, charity in the old fashioned sense of the word. My huge 1959 Webster’s dictionary defines charity as ‘love, benevolence; affection; good will; that disposition of heart which inclines men to think favorably of their fellow men, and to do them good’.
I admire my grandfather because he not only worked very hard towards his goals (which frequently was feeding himself and his family), but he loved, welcomed and encouraged those around him at the same time. He was glad to encourage others, and thrilled to know of others’ achievements. And, in doing so, he created friendships that last a lifetime and ensured that he was surrounded by people who loved and supported him.
So in helping others, he helped his own success. And so, by his example, I’ve learned my Toolbox for Life. It contains courage, determination, perseverance, patience, and charity. I’m learning to live with those values and remembering my grandfather as I work to fill his footsteps.
Irene Kehler lives in Vancouver, Canada, and works in the fashion industry. Irene designs quality clothing to match an individual's personal style. She loves to help others and fundraising is her passion. She helps many organizations through fundraisers with her gourmet candles. Read more at http://www.mycandleparadise.com and http://living-n-learning.com.
